It's that time of year again folks! X Factor mania has hit our screens and I cannot begin to tell you how happy I am that the annoying audition stages are now over and the live shows are about to start although I have to say that I'm a tad dubious about some of the decisions made!
Firstly, is Dannii Minogue mad? Paije is a wee Luther Vandross in the making if you ask me and should have been put through (obviously I am very experienced in this field due to my constant ipod listening and being kept up to date on who sings what by my children when we've the radio on in the car therefore my views should be taken very seriously!!) I cannot for the life of me understand why she put in the Oitalian diva as he quite obviously has trouble written all over him (he'll be demanding his own dressing room and wanting scented candles and his own stash of M&M's before too long you mark my words!) I am, however, in favour of her other two choices...Matt Cardle is simply delightful and his vocals remind me of Daniel Bedingfield (see, told you I knew what I was talking about!) and Aiden Grimshaw is just lovely (wonder if he's a far out relation of Eileen and Jason's or has any relations in Weatherfield?!)
Poor oul' Louis definitely had the toughest choices to make due to the sheer lack of talent in his category! Firstly, let's talk about the 'house husband'....never before has a title left me in such a state of confusion and it wasn't because I doubted his domestic capabilities more the reference to a 'husband' which suggested that there was a 'wife'??!! Then there was Mr Vanderwhat's his face who looked like his hair had been the victim of electric shock treatment and he spent all his free time fighting for space in the tanning salon with Jordan. I was so glad he didn't get through as the mere look of him would have irritated by happiness! How Wagner ever got through in the first place was beyond me as he looked like something that had just stepped out of a Mexican western and didn't sound much better either! On the other hand you should have heard me when 'our Mary' got her place! For me, this lady represents thousands of us out there who haven't had the courage to grab what we want in life until something finally gives us a push! She is an absolute inspiration and I hope she does well and that Tesco will have to start recruiting again! Storm (and his newly dyed red hair?) will go down like a bag of badgers with Simon which is precisely why I think it was a good idea...sparks will fly! I also liked John but was gutted that Elisha Moses didn't get a chance (if only for the fact that she was semi-normal which seemed to be a bonus in that group!)
Simon definitely made the right decisions as far as I was concerned although I have to say that I was quite partial to Husstle and did wish they had got through! Although Twem were likeable characters I think it would have been a mistake to let them through...think French Jedward.....shudder! Bellame were absolutely fabulous and deserve the most credit due to the fact that they weren't a group before simply four individual singers...fair play to you girls! Both boy bands were also to my liking (its very important to keep me happy y'know) so Simon Cowell has my approval (God love him he'll probably sleep better now in that knowledge!)
Now we come to Cheryl!! I need to take several deep breaths and have a good scratch at the old head before I even contemplate what drugs she was on before she made her decisions! Katie?????????? Only Blogger might take issue with the use of obscene language there is a lot more I would like to say but for now ten question marks and me wondering who thought it was a good idea to nick a peacock's feathers to stick around her eyes and hand her a parasol when she was auditioning will have to suffice!! Rebecca has an amazing voice (Sade better watch out...there is no end to my musical knowledge) but I would prefer if she would stop snotterin' at every turn round as it is rather off putting! Cher is a lovely girl and very talented who offers something different however I'm a bit annoyed that she was put through over and above others who were fit to perform...like my wee Gamu for example who has had me 'walking on sunshine' since I first heard her and who to her credit also had Louis delicately dabbing his eyes with a hankie at bootcamp! I also loved Treyc and her rendition of Ave Maria and thought Keri also deserved a shot! Poor Anastasia got rejected again but to be honest although I liked her there was nothing that stood out for me! Can I also just ask as an extra question...why did Will. i. am think it would be a good idea to wear his scuba diving goggles to the auditions...is it possible that they hold some special powers of decision making? No, that can't be it because if they did Katie wouldn't have gone through...miaaaaoooowww.
As the credits rolled last night we heard that there will be a twist and it no longer seems to be a secret that this will take the form of four wildcard contestants being allowed to be picked on the first live show with one being voted through by the public!
Right...I hope yis are all paying attention now...Dannii...please give Paije a shot! Simon...give Husstle a chance or perhaps let Diva Fever through, Louis...please put Elisha Moses through and Cheryl...(wags finger and speaks sternly) preferably dump that blonde bimbo or failing that pick my wee Gamu to entertain us or Treyc or Keri!
Never mind Nicole Sherzinger (who I liked by the way) they should get me in to sort it all out! Sure, Louis and I have already proved we look the part together ;)
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