Wasps...why we don't get on!

Hello friends,

I am becoming increasingly unnerved at the amount of black and yellow winged creatures we have buzzing around us at the moment. I know that wasps in general probably don't have a big fan base but I have to admit to being totally terrified of them! As with most things in life that scare us half to death there was an 'incident' involving me, 'it' and the entire canteen where I worked at the time! I must have carried the little fecker in on my shirt, it must then have navigated its way down my back where it stung me and I performed an impromptu strip for my workmates in an effort to get away from it.

There was a first aider...there was vinegar and...there was much fuss. However, it wasn't until I heard the words "Oh my God her lips are turning blue," that I started getting concerned. Anaphylactic shock...I had never actually heard of it before but now I was a victim. By the time I got to casualty I had a trout pout that Katie Price would have been proud of and my tongue had swollen as had my throat which was all very alarming. I spent several minutes being attended before I was taken by ambulance to another hospital where a drip was administered and I had to stay for two nights. When I got home if you'd shook me I would probably have rattled I had that much medication to take to counteract the venom that had been pumped into my system! I now have to carry an adrenelin injection with me which buys me time until I can get to hospital. I love it when I start a new job and have to declare that I possess one of these and that if I get stung someone may well have to plunge it into the muscle in my thigh...needless to say windows are kept closed at ALL times!

When I see a wasp these days you will therefore understand why I don't react in an altogether rational manner...ahem! My poor family have been forced on occasions to pretend they don't know me and that I'm just a screaming nutjob that's following them whilst doing an Indian wardance and shreiking 'get away from me' in petrified tones as if Freddie Kreugar himself is chasing me!

I do warn you though...the next person to say 'ach sure its only a wee thing and it's probably more scared of you than you are of it' is going to get thumped. Hard. Try to be understanding, try to be empathetic and unless you have a death wish DO NOT under any circumstances tell me to stay still...because if I don't kill you...the wasp just might!